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I once dated a guy who refused to go down on me. As if his dick tasted like an ice cream cone.

9 Reasons Guys Love Giving You Oral

Friends I confided in at the time ugy I stop giving him blow jobs, to give him a taste of his own medicine. But since I enjoy giving pleasure, no BJs felt like double the punishment. And how else does one get what one wants out of sex than by talking about it?

All that spitting and sucking and vagina slapping: What is going on there? Heterosexual porn scenes usually go something like this: Girl gets naked; girl shows off her body for a while; girl gives guy a blow job; girl and guy have intercourse; the end.

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Rarely in this scenario does the guy reciprocate oral sex. Well, porn imitates life imitates porn, as they say.

Of course, there are exceptions. Some guys are very generous and adept in the oral department, and some porn does emphasize pleasure for the woman. But good looking guy for oral only fact is, almost all mainstream porn is giy by men, for men, and it shows—the aim of the scenes is always to get the man off.

As a result, in the real world, many girls and guys think that the aim of sex is to get the man off. And honestly, many goodd my hook-ups with men have felt driven by that singular goal.

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As someone who also sleeps with women, I feel I have a good looking guy for oral only counterpoint. My female partners have been unanimously more giving and considerate, and certainly more likely to give me head.

Porn is great for many things, but learning how to genuinely please a woman is not one of. Now, I understand that cunnilingus is not the simplest of tasks.

But as a general rule, lick lightly. Men seem to think that blow jobs are easy—that you just ffor and try to keep your teeth out of the way.

Samantha once famously broke christian blind date down for a lover in Sex and the Onlu Not to mention that BJs often result in a mouthful of bodily fluids—that's way more intense than anything cunnilingus has to offer, even if the girl goes full bush.

And for the record, it is possible to give a bad blow job. I once made the mistake of eating a kale salad twenty minutes before deep throating.

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It wasn't pretty, nor was it my proudest BJ moment. One of my favorite videos from the Desire Project—an evolving online documentary where women share stories about desire—is of a girl named Amy talking about how she used to hate receiving oral sex.

Sexual egos are fragile, probably especially in men, who are expected to be looling competent. But perpetuating negative or ineffective sexual behavior is bad for everyone involved.

Oral Sex: The #1 Thing He Wants in Bed Is | Glamour

As Dan Savage always says, women have to enable their own pleasure—we have to be our own best advocate in bed, and be as aggressive and entitled as men are. But then I remember that I, too, have been that girl.

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